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What to do first when someone dies unexpectedly

Did your loved one leave a final wishes letter or end-of-life plan? This document likely includes valuable information and directions for surviving family members, as well as for the medical professionals, lawyers, financial managers, insurance agents, and funeral home involved in your loved one’s funeral, burial, or estate.

Reading your loved one’s final wishes

One of the very first things you will need to do after a loved one passes away is to have them legally pronounced dead. If they passed in a hospital or hospice, this will be handled for you, but if they died at home, you will have to call someone. This is generally their physician, but if you don't know who their doctor was, call a funeral home or the local coroner or medical examiner's office. Ambulance crews cannnot generally make a legal death pronouncement.

Getting a legal pronouncement of death

If your loved one dies at home

Transporting your loved one’s body is a challenging and time-sensitive task. A funeral home can be a great source of support for information and assistance. A hospital will only keep a body for 72 hours, and you must register an in-home death within 5 days. Keep in mind pricing and laws when transporting, whether nationally or internationally.

Transporting a loved one after they’ve passed

Properly honoring a servicemember who has died comes with a few extra steps, including who to notify (VA, Department of Defense), what benefits to claim (survivor benefits, dependency and indemnity compensation, survivors pension, burial expense benefits), and finding additional paperwork (service record and discharge information). You may also be entitled to special funeral arrangements.


Handling a veteran’s affairs 

Understanding death with dignity

If you are your loved one's next of kin, you may be asked to decide whether to donate their organs, if they are a viable donor and they did not register. This is not a decision to take lightly. Knowing the facts will help you make the right choice for your loved one. If you do choose to donate their organs, take comfort in knowing that your loved one will save lives even after they are gone.

Making decisions about organ donation 

Right after someone close to you passes away, there will be a lot of intense or confusing emotions, and a lot of tasks that need doing that can seem totally out of step with how you are feeling. That's completely normal, and OK. Make sure you enlist friends who can help you organize what needs to get done and take tasks off your hands so you can get back to grieving and processing your feelings.

The first few days

Ordering death certificates may be the last thing you want to think about after losing your loved one; however, it’s an essential step in settling affairs. Obtaining 24 to 36 of these documents now will save you time and energy in the future, as most institutions require an original signed copy. The easiest way to get multiple copies is to request them from the funeral home or mortuary while you’re working with them.

Thinking ahead: Death certificates

When your loved one’s last residence was an elder care facility, there are some specific considerations you need to keep in mind. The staff will be able to help you with most things, so rely on their assistance. Keep in mind that any bills should not be paid right away.

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It can feel challenging to make arrangements for your loved one’s pets while you yourself are grieving. They will need food, exercise, attention, and comfort. Pets can show signs of grief, too. These furry creatures who were once dependent on your loved one are now dependent on you. It is therefore important to prioritize their wellbeing and remember that they, too, feel the stress of these recent changes following your loved one's passing.


Taking care of your loved one’s pet

The first call to make when a loved one dies

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